Forms.  Piles and piles of forms.  With every program we’ve been through so far, there have been forms, to agree to sign other forms.  Forms for release of information.  Forms for obtaining information.  Forms for medical tests, and forms for the results.  Forms for classes, forms for communicating, forms for staying, forms for going…really no end of forms.  During an intake to any program, you spend approximately 1 hour at the beginning signing forms, and then usually get presented with many others along the way.

Perhaps it’s my real estate back ground, perhaps it’s having run my own business, or perhaps it’s the fact that I may have trust issues, but when I’m presented with a form, I will read it in full before I put my name on it.  I’m pretty sure many people just accept those forms as is, and never really read through, because they’re always shocked when I read.  I don’t feel pressure, and I don’t rush, I read thoroughly before I go ahead.

One of the forms I’ve signed, and I’m sure many other parents do, is a sex ed form.  Now in every school, there is a sex ed class that they teach that requires approval.  The form is pretty generic, and they say some content such as safe sex, STD’s, and basic topics like that. When I was in grade 4, the school nurse gathered all the girls together, and talked to us about getting our monthly.  The book, “Are you there God, It’s Me , Margaret” had just been released, and everyone was reading it.  We were trying to approach our parents, saying “it” had arrived, and they had no clue what we were talking about. The nurse went in to detail, we were thoroughly grossed out, and very glad when it was all over.  In grade 5, the boys and girls had to sit in the same room and watch “the film”.  It talked about zits, showering, how boys like girls, and girls like boys, and puberty, and all the gross stuff included in the topic.  I remember we were all embarrassed and giggled when the nurse talked about it at the end of the class.  We couldn’t wait to be out of there.

As I said, I read and signed a sex ed form for one of the programs my daughter was recently in.  It didn’t say anything out of the ordinary, and I knew she was one of the youngest there, but I was not prepared for the conversation that followed.

“We talked about all the stuff from 50 shades of grey and that kind of thing.”

“Oh, really?  And how did you feel about that?”

“Well, they described why S&M and all that stuff is dangerous.  That no means no.”

“Ok, well, that’s good.  Anything you have questions about?”

“No.  We had a chance to ask questions, and were all really embarrassed, so, like one of the guys, who’s really good with accents and stuff, read the questions like this….(English accent) teacher, when you fist…)

“When you what?”

“You know, fist. Don’t you know what that is?”

“No?! What is it?”

The description came and I slammed on my brakes. My car came to a screeching halt in the middle of a residential street, and my head thrust forward and almost hit my steering wheel. I couldn’t believe my ears! And double fisting? That’s really possible?  My jaw was literally hanging open, eyes wide, in complete utter shock.

“What?! Are you kidding me? That’s what you’re discussing? That’s what I said yes to? I can’t even believe that’s possible?! What the heck?!!”

Now I might be a little old fashioned, but really? Is that necessary? I’d just like to thank El James for opening up a pile of garbage that we now get to explain to our kids. This is what we get to compare real life to. Our kids don’t come home and ask about “it”. They get to come home and think about being bound and gagged, or beaten, and wonder if that’s normal.

Had I known that those were the topics my child would be exposed to, I would have thought long and hard, and definitely asked more questions, before signing that form. It’s not that I’m opposed to knowledge, but do we really have to know everything?  I really don’t think so.  My life was perfectly fine without ever knowing the terms I’ve learned.

I don’t think everything has to be defined.  I don’t think all knowledge has to be known by all.  I don’t have to experience everything to know my life is great as it is.  I can really take my own experience and standards and filter how far I want to go.  I have a choice – it’s called free will – the ability to choose and say yes or no.  I also have a little life experience that allows me to sit in a room and know when things are going to far, or when the content I’m being exposed to is getting to be too much.  When our kids sit in a classroom and are taught, they are expected to stay, listen and learn.  They become victims of the opinions and potential values of the person at the head of the class.  I am not against learning, but do they have to know everything all at once?